In Focus

Straight Talk

In a time of "Political Correctness," it's unlikely you'll find a lot of that among the Chicks. Thank goodness for that! I like it when people are straight-shooters and tell it like it is. Speaking of. can we talk for just a minute about what the cluck is goin' on in Florida? Look, we're a group of women who like to give tips from how to start investment clubs to golf. Did you really expect silence about the current situation down South? "The Chads of Broward County" is just one of the titles being given to this fiasco. And Secretary of State, Katherine Harris has been compared to Ruth Buzzi and Ozzy Osbourne. What next? Soon, some people will claim that pregnant chads will give birth in nine months, and we should ultimately wait for their votes to be counted, too.

Here's the positive about the situation: for the first time in many, many years (maybe ever), people everywhere are listening and learning about American government. Being someone raised in a home where politics were prevalent, I have always found it difficult to understand how people don't want to know all they can on the subject. And the worst part is when those people go around spouting off their opinions based on something they heard from a talk show host while eating Kettle chips from another room. So disheartening. But now, finally, people are interested in how this country works. That's the truly exciting thing about this whole election mess.

There's another reason people are so interested in the presidential election. Not just because they think military votes should be counted, but because the market has demonstrated that it's not too crazy about all this havoc. And when it comes to people and their pocketbooks, the impersonal stock market becomes an extremely personal issue. Like the volatile market (one day you're up, the next you're down), this election takes a couple dozen turns in a day. You've probably watched your stocks go haywire the last week and a half, too. I think we can count on that to continue until these circumstances can work themselves out. But at the end of the day (or week, or month) one of these men will become President-elect and the question becomes "how will this president affect my portfolio?"

I can't give you a definitive answer on that, but it's certainly been discussed to death. In tune with the current goings-on, there are few things that everyone can agree on so I've been tracking what seems to be the consensus. And that's this: the industries/companies that will benefit from an Al Gore presidency include anything environmental, and companies such as Sun Microsystems and America Online. Gore's September, 1993 book entitled "Earth In The Balance" shows his strong opinions on the "deterioration of the environment" and what changes he feels need to take place. If you check out his web site at www.algore.com you'll see his ideas for boosting technology and opening global markets for US companies. Oh, and let's not forget, the man did invent the Internet!! (C'mon, laugh a little, it's the only way to get through this!!) Those benefiting from a George W. Bush victory include drug companies, the defense industry, tobacco companies, and mutual fund firms. If you don't already know, a visit to www.georgebush.com will keep you posted on Bush's desire to do things like rebuild the military and allow people to use portions of their social security to invest on their own. This makes companies like T. Rowe Price jump up and down. So get poised and ready, and when the last gavel is thrown, drop your money into the respective area.

It's probably not as cut and dry as all that. And there's another factor to consider. No matter who is in the White House, the man holding all of our eggs, able to crush them in a single interest-rate hike, or turn them to gold, is Mr. Alan Greenspan. He'll be hanging around until 2004, and in all this upheaval, he may be our only source of stability.

Anyway, my intention here is point out that there have been some good things to come out of what's happening. I am choosing to see my cup half full; and praying that my pockets don't end up empty. I am highlighting the reality that for the first time folks are expressing their interest in government. Don't worry, when the decision finally comes the market will be go back to normal. (Another great oxymoron, the "market being normal.") The goods have been put before you on which guy may or may not make you rich (or something like that). You've been introduced, or perhaps reintroduced to the memory of Ruth Buzzi. And lastly, Democrats everywhere are putting the name "Chad" at the top of their potential baby names list. This has been one productive day!

NOTE: This article was not intended to make a mockery of a serious situation. It was written after thirteen days of lawsuits, countersuits, dimpled Chads, and utter chaos, all of which I have followed closely. Also, it does NOT reflect the views of all the Chicks. For that scoop just check out our boards in the Meeting Place. Carry on!